canine carcinoma changed my life
For those of you that don’t know me on a more personal basis, I lost my beloved best friend, my (fur) baby Austyn in September 2017. He had been experiencing a decline since December 2016. It started as what appeared to be neurological symptoms - his gait was off, he was having bowel accidents in his sleep. We had an MRI done to rule out spinal injury or disease, it was negative. We started using the raindrop technique with essential oils for him. He responded well and I think this largely contributed to his improvement and ultimately what helped him live for so long with such a severe illness. His gait improved and he seemed to be getting better with controlling his bowels but was still vomiting. We were told a few years ago that he had pancreatitis and we had switched him to a low fat diet to help manage this. We assumed the vomiting was a pancreatic flare up. We also knew that he needed to have a few teeth pulled because the roots were broken. When he started vomiting more frequently in July, I decided that we needed to get the teeth pulled sooner than later - assuming this was contributing to the vomiting. I thought perhaps the inability to chew properly could be affecting him keeping his food down. He had the teeth pulled at the beginning of August. He came home drooling excessively and on soft food - as to be expected. His decline was quite quick from this point. We struggled to get him to eat, he lost weight very quickly and eventually by the third week in August he stopped eating all together. I knew then that something was very wrong.
I took him to see Mimi (our veterinarian) and after doing an X-ray, she decided the best thing to do was have him seen by a specialist in the city ASAP. From what she could see, his stomach and liver looked enlarged. I looked at her with tears in my eyes and told her that I would need her help making THE decision when the time came. She asked me to promise her one thing... that I take really good care of myself because the last thing Austyn would want - for me to get sick too. That may sound cheesy to some but that dog was my angel. His purpose in life was to protect and comfort me. He was sent to put all my broken pieces back together after my injury left me shattered. He saved my life.
I took him to Toronto on August 28 - the 22nd anniversary of my Mom’s death. Part of me felt relieved when they said that they wanted to keep him overnight, do a scope and get him feeling better but part of me already felt the bad news coming. I was uneasy leaving my baby at a veterinary hospital that we had never been to. I was nervous leaving him knowing how sick he was.
Shortly after returning home, I got the call that broke my heart. My beautiful boy had adenocarcinoma in his stomach and the prognosis wasn’t good. I remember sitting in my kitchen screaming. This couldn’t be real. Austyn was always so healthy! I thought that I had done everything possible to keep him healthy. But like with most things, the mainstream way of medical care leaves out a lot of important details.
I had to at least try to get more answers and see if there was anything we could do to give him more time with a good quality of life. I refused to fight for more time to only watch him continue to suffer. I agreed to a biopsy and he came home two days later. I stopped sleeping for fear of him suffering alone. I laid awake at night with him in my arms as I researched all the natural therapies that we could try, dietary changes we could make and anything dog cancer related.
After the biopsy results came back, we decided that surgery followed by holistic treatment was his best chance at extending his life. We found an incredible surgeon downtown Toronto that got us in right away. We went downtown Toronto on a Wednesday morning to meet with the surgeon and the oncologist. The surgeon decided to give him fluids overnight and do surgery in the morning.
Unfortunately and fortunately, once surgery was underway they were able to see the full extent of the mass. I say fortunately because had they not seen the full extent before cutting, they could have killed him on the operating table. Sadly, there was no way to remove the mass without damaging the vagus nerve - which is what would have killed him almost instantly.
I asked the doctor to just close the incision and we would come get him. I called Mimi (our vet) with the devastating news. We came up with a plan together and she agreed to come that evening to help us send him off to Rainbow Bridge.
Our home very quickly filled with friends and family that had come to see our boy off. It was a very unique experience - a wake for a dog who was still living. It was the perfect way to honour this dog that was loved by so many. My baby boy was surrounded by all the people in his life that he loved. My boys were each able to give him one last big snuggle.
After everyone else had a chance to snuggle him, we picked him up and carried him to my bed. I held my beautiful twin flame as closely as I could, while he took his last breath and left his physical being on this earth.
My world went black for a few weeks afterward. This is when I started to experience the symptoms of Breast Implant Illness but I was so shattered and broken from the loss, that I didn’t piece it all together. I don’t remember much from those first few weeks. Being devastated and so sick made me disconnect completely from the world around me. Even my kids. I’m still sorting through some of the unresolved emotions about how I handled it. I wish I had been able to be stronger and more communicative for the kids but I was so unprepared for the devastation of this loss. I always knew that the day would come and I knew that it would be difficult but I just wasn’t ready. I don’t think you can ever be ready.
My nights of research lead me to so many great resources and it essentially forced me to learn more about how I could use my essential oils to comfort my ailing pup. I learned a lot about the hidden evils in mainstream veterinary care and pet nutrition. It’s changed everything about how I care for my animals.
While a raw or home cooked meal is great for dogs it can be challenging and time consuming. I fully intend on home cooked meals for our new Dog, Fred but I have to regain strength first and foremost. Raw diet is much too risky, in my opinion, with a face licking pup and three young boys.
One of the best things I stumbled across was the website of Dr Peter Dobias. Dr Dobias is based out BC. Dr Dobias has an incurably informative blog for simplifying holistic care for your dog. He has also has a line of supplements that we’ve implemented into Fred’s routine. Anyone with a dog needs to check him out.
Another really cool connection that I made was with Nancy and Colin at Thistledown Pet Memorials in Uxbridge, Ontario. Thistledown Pet Memorials are the wonderful people that handled all of the after care. Like funeral services for dogs. I was extremely hesitant to call - for one, I thought the cost would be prohibitive. Second, I wasn’t sure that I wanted to know anything about the process. I am so glad that I called them. The experience at Thistledown is indescribable - so healing. The best part, it really doesn’t cost much more than what I was paying through the vet for cremation. I had my boy’s ashes cremated and returned to me the same day. I really can’t say enough about how healing the after care at Thistledown was! I hope that some of you will keep them in mind when the time comes.
http://www.thistledown.info
4766 Concession Rd 7
Uxbridge, ON
L9P 1R4
(905) 852-5648
